I've been thinking about pagan ethics lately, and particularly forgiveness. Starhawk claims that forgiveness isn't a pagan value, and on the surface she seems to be right. But my heart disagrees.
Forgiveness isn't about not bringing rapists to justice. It isn't about letting people walk all over you. Forgiveness means that after a certain amount of time, you try to let it go. It means choosing (or trying to choose-- forgiveness can be difficult) not to carry anger and resentment.
On the other hand, anyone who claims that you have to forgive someone in order to prove yourself as a spiritually evolved human being is full of shit. Nobody can tell you when it's time to forgive something, if ever.
Even more important than forgiving others is forgiving ourselves. Ours is a religion without sin, and supposedly without guilt, and I am beginning to wonder if this might actually hurt us, in some ways. Despite our best intentions, we will make mistakes. We all do; it's part of being human. Yes, we should try to learn from them, but tormenting yourself every time you accidentally through out a glass bottle instead of recycling it doesn't do anybody any favors. And many of us will do that, rehashing every minor mistake, reliving them in our minds. That doesn't help us to grow, except in neurosis.
So what do we do, when our religion does not recognize this problem? In The Circle Within, Dianne Sylvan suggests calling on the compassion of the gods, remembering that you are a child of the God/dess. Personally, I find that to be a lovely, if difficult, solution. And since I'm not exploring spirituality for the easy answers it might give me, that satisfies my problem on a personal level.
I've seen pagans argue that our gods are not the compassionate types, and hold us to the highest standards. I disagree. As humans, we will make mistakes. We aren't here to be perfect; we're here to learn and love and grow. And I can't bring myself to believe in a deity who is not wise enough or generous enough to recognize that basic truth.
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2 comments:
I am curious what paganism has to say in terms of an ethical system. One thing that's become clear to me in my spiritual travels is that my spirituality and my moral code are separate things: I feel the presence of the divine in my life, but it doesn't tell me what to do. I create a moral code based on the best way I can think of to share the world with others. When I don't live up to these standards, I am not penalized by the divine, nor does it tell me that it's okay. The only connection I can find is that it is easier to sense the divine when I am at peace with myself, and easier to be at peace with myself when I am getting along well with the world, which in turn happens when I am behaving morally well.
Our paths are obviously not the same, but they intersect in little ways, so I am curious about your opinion.
Short answer: which paganism?
Longer answer: Some branches (Asatru, for instance) have very specific moral codes (in that case, the Nine Noble Virtues). Wicca has the Rede (An' it harm none, do what thou will) and the Threefold Law (everything you do comes back to you times 3). Both of these tend to come under harsh criticism. What does it mean to harm no one? Is that even possible? And the Threefold Law sounds awfully simplistic.
This leaves most us to work it out for ourselves. I think that most pagans can agree that respect for the earth is important, but beyond that I doubt you could find any serious consensus.
I suspect that a lot varies based on what Gods a person works with, for instance. You look to them, see what they seem to stand for, and then try to bring those values into your own life. And since the Gods of old are hardly a homogeneous lot, and many tend to encounter new/nameless Gods as we go along, that in itself can bring a lot of dissension into the mix.
Ummm, I think this comment might have gotten longer than the original post. I hope it answered your question!
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